Let's Cee a Movie

That giant shadow hanging over the film is from the previous movie

This film feels repetitive in way I don’t remember the novel or miniseries being (Unmarked Spoilers)

It: Chapter Two opens with an all too real-life horror. Where Adrian Mellon (Xavier Dolan) becomes the victim of a brutal, homophobic hate crime befalls. Sadly, that’s something that’s just as relevant today as it was in the 1980s when the book was published. You almost hope that Pennywise (Bill Skarsgård) shows up soon. Almost.

What’s your favorite scary tv show?

The fact that doesn’t have the same ring to it is an apt metaphor for the show itself.

Why am I writing a tv show review on a movie website? Because there is a whole world of movies that have branched out into television that need to be covered. Such as the third season of the Scream tv series. Which also has a brand new subtitle.

Is it Rocketman or Rocket Man?

No, seriously. I’m confused.

Rocketman tells the “true” story of a gay, British musician and the trials and turbulences that come with a life of sex, drugs, and rock ‘n’ roll. Coming right off the heels of Bohemian Rhapsody, a movie with the same premise and director Dexter Fletcher. Or at least the parts that weren’t already shot by Bryan Singer.

The most dangerous game

Here I come…

After getting married, beautiful bride Grace (Samara Weaving) learns that she’ll have to play a game of hide and seek with her new in-laws, the Le Domas family. But to her horror, she quickly realizes the meaning of the awful pun I make in the title of this review. Now, to the family’s credit, Grace is given the opportunity of backing out of getting married multiple times. Even if they don’t mention what the consequences are going to be.

The burn is bright

It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s a–run for your life.

Get ready to be meet Brandon Breyer (Jackson A. Dunn), who has one of those sweet, alliterate names that rolls right off the tongue. Like Clark Kent or Lex Luthor or Michael Meyers. He’s brilliant too because despite not paying attention in class, he’s immediately able to rattle off how wasps are more violent than bees and engage in brood parasitism or some other foreshadowing mumbo jumbo like that. Because saying Brandon’s not from around here is a colossal understatement.

It’s a scary story made up of many scary stories

This ought to tide me over until It: Chapter Two

After a chance encounter with newcomer Ramón (Michael Garza), a trio of friends consisting of Stella (Zoe Colletti), Auggie (Gabriel Rush), and Tommy (Austin Abrams) decide to show him the local haunted house. Home to Sarah Bellows (Kathleen Pollard), who according to legend, would tell children scary stories from her special book. A book that Stella decides to take with her. Calling that decision a mistake would be an understatement.

You will never guess what happens

I hope you like politics along with your romance

Fred Flasrsky (Seth Rogen) is a bleeding heart journalist with an uncanny knack of surviving falls that would kill or incapacitate an average person. One day he quits/gets fired after the new owner of his newspaper ends up being the embodiment of everything he hates about America. Said new owner is media mogul Parker Wembley (Andy Serkis), the love child of Steve Bannon and Gollum.

Will they save the world or mock each other to death first?

Good God there are a ton of movies in this franchise

MI6 agent Hattie Shaw (Vanessa Kirby) is on the run after being framed for killing her entire team by Brixton (Idris Elba). With there being only two people to track her down. DSS Agent Luke Hobbs (Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson) and British soldier-turned-mercenary Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham). You’d think the CIA would get two people who wouldn’t give an emphatic no to teaming up and bicker like an old married couple, but c’est la vie. Who find themselves forced to work together to save Hattie and the world.

Number 9

In a far, far away land in California

Upon seeing a trailer for Once upon a time…in Hollywood, my mom asks me what that movie is about. So I, as the film critic of the family, say “well, it’s a movie—about making movies. And Sharon Tate and Charles Manson are there for reasons that I guess I’ll just have to see the movie to understand.”

H-E Double Hockey Sticks Boy

Witness the most expensive B-movie ever made

The first case that we see Hellboy (David Harbour) work in the film is to locate Agent Esteban Ruiz (Mario de la Rosa), who’s gone missing after being sent to uncover a coven of vampires. Sure enough, Ruiz has unfortunately been turned into a vampire and after a brief Lucha libre fight (no, it doesn’t make any more sense in the context of the movie) Hellboy is forced to kill him. Much to Hellboy’s regret as Ruiz had been a drinking body and someone he had been trying to save. At which point his adoptive father Trevor Bruttenholm (Ian McShane) tells him to move on because Ruiz was a monster. Plus, he has a new assignment. To assist the Osiris Club in hunting down three giants.