I bet the Scorch is looking pretty good right about now The main character of the film is Hayley (Kaya Scodelario), a competitive swimmer with the University of Florida because of irony. Upon realizing that her estranged father Dave (Barry Pepper) isn’t responding to any phone calls, Hayley postpones evacuating from the massive, incoming hurricane to …
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I knew these escape rooms were a bad idea
I want to play a game (Unmarked Spoilers) The contestants of this Saw ripoff consist of Zoey (Taylor Russell), a quiet college student. Ben (Logan Miller), a wage slave working an awful job. Amanda (Deborah Ann Woll), a war vet. Mike (Tyler Labine), a fat guy I really liked in Reaper. Jason (Jay Ellis), a slick businessman. And …
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Vacation, all he ever wanted
From now on I will only refer to the Spider Sense as the Peter Tingle I hope you’ve seen Endgame because, after the prologue, this movie opens with a list of people who “died.” With the prologue itself introducing us to Quentin Beck/Mysterio, who’s the exact opposite of his comic counterpart. The source material’s Mysterio was a …
All happy families are alike
Wouldyou rather spend a night at the castle or Hill House? Here’s a breakdown of the surviving members of the Blackwood family. Youngest Daughter Mary Katherine or Merricat (Taissa Farmiga) looks, talks, and acts like she’s the spawn of Satan. Uncle Julian (Crispin Glover) is living on a different plane of reality. Oldest Daughter Constance …
Here come the Men in Black
Probably for the last time though Agent M (Tessa Thompson) is the latest MIB recruit sent to the London branch, where she learns a lot of amazing things. Like how the Eiffel Tower was the center of one of the first great alien migrations, and its builder was a founder of the Men in Black. …
I’m your friend till the end
I know they changed it to ‘you are my Buddi until the end.’ I don’t care. Picking up shortly after the third movie left off, we find Woody (Tom Hanks) once again struggling with no longer being king of the castle. Thankfully he’s matured enough that no one ends up getting thrown out a window …
You’ve got a friend in me
I know I should be mad at them for taking shots at Toy Story, but I thought this one was actually pretty funny Before I go on, I feel the need to say just one thing. Which is that since to some legal mumbo jumbo that I didn’t care enough to research the specifics of, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer …
One Good Mother
One Good Mother? Are you serious? That’s terrible. I’m going to need to fire my joke person (Unmarked Spoilers) Following an apocalyptic disaster, a lone robot called Mother (motion capture by Luke Hawker, voiced by Rose Byrne) sets about repopulation the human race. Raising Daughter (Clara Rugaard) from a small embryo, all is peaceful, and …
An enjoyable case of déjà vu
Olivia Wilde sets the bar high with her directorial debut This movie is very similar to Superbad. Yeah, I’m sure I just blew your mind with that observation. I bet I’m the only person to have realized that. Interestingly, watching Booksmart and Superbad is a good exercise in seeing how society has constructed gender. The main character of both films are insufferable, …
Prepare for War
All he needs are lots of guns a Matrix reference Before I go on, let’s back up a little and go over all the bad decisions made in-universe that have brought us to this point. So, Isoef Tarasov (Alfie Allen) is the son of this New York mob boss Viggo (Michael Nyqvist) and a total moron. How …
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