Let's Cee a Movie

DUNDUN DUN DUNDUN

How many versions of the same movie are we going to get? (Unmarked Spoilers)

After Halloween, I have another franchise that seems to be as unstoppable as its main villain — consisting of The Terminator, the one that started it all. Terminator 2: Judgement Day, the unquestioned apex of the series that has almost everything you could want in a movie. And all the others that I want to say are, on average, above par. Before I go on, I feel like I level with you that I liked Terminator: Genysis. Yes, I know, that and the fact I liked The Last Jedi has never made me doubt my critical capabilities more. Though if you want to keep reading even knowing that, by all means.

The night he came home, three times

A holiday retrospective.

Halloween (1978) is one of those movies that has a massive impact on the genre. Much like Suspiria (1977), there’s not really any character development, and the little plot in the film is basically an excuse for great music and atmosphere. Here’s the whole plot in a nutshell. Murderer Michael Myers (Nick Castle, Tony Moran, Will Sandin) escapes from the sanitarium he was locked up in for killing his sister. The movie then becomes over an hour of people driving, walking, standing, trying to have sex, listening to Dr. Loomis (Donald Pleasence) go on about his patient’s evil, and hearing the audience scream ‘he’s right there, just turn around (NSFW) and look behind you.’

Cool party bro

I assume killer party was too obvious a title

Casper (Sam Strike) is a young thief just trying to get him and his dad out of their lousy neighborhood. Then his dad ends up getting in deep with a loan shark. Desperate, Casper decides to rob this wealthy family, the Dawsons, during a party they’re throwing with his two friends, Dodge (Brandon Michael Hall) and Iris (Virginia Gardner).

When you’re good to Mama

What’s wrong with these kids today?

Ah, Blumhouse Productions, for every good movie you come out with, you have about five bad ones. One of their latest releases is Ma, which is about a group of teenagers who, while trying to find someone to buy beer for them, end up bumping into Sue Ann (Octavia Spencer) or “Ma” as she quickly becomes called. And get this, Ma not only buys the booze for them but invites them to party up at her house whenever they want. And why not, she’s clearly just a harmless eccentric, just like Annie Wilkes (Kathy Bates).

Da-da-da-dum (snap, snap)

There are worse movies to take your kids to

Tired of always being on the run from angry mobs, Gomez (Oscar Isaac) and Morticia (Charlize Theron) look for a place that’s so horrible, no person other than them would go there. Winding up in New Jersey, they find a haunted sanitarium that they think is perfect to start a family. They also meet an escaped mental patient named Lurch (Conrad Vernon), who they end up enslaving, I guess. Seriously, there’s no scene in this where they ask Lurch, ‘do you want to spend the rest of your life waiting on my family hand and foot.’ They just start giving him orders.

Jesse’s back, b***h

But did he really need to be?

Breaking Bad (NSFW) is the greatest show ever. Now that I’m not hearing those words all the time, I actually kind of miss them. Now, years later, we have a feature-length movie continuing the story. After deciding to cook meth with Walter White (Bryan Cranston), Jesse Pinkman (Aaron Paul) has been through all kinds of trials and turbulence. And after a harrowing series finale, he finds himself on the run and with a boatload of PTSD. Unfortunately for him, his problems also don’t seem to be letting up anytime soon.

King of Comedy 2: Why so serious?

His dance moves are certainly better than Tobey Maguire‘s

Arthur Fleck (Joaquin Phoenix) is a man whose whole life sucks. He can’t find a source of steady employment, mental illness has left him struggling with recognizing social cues, and the city he’s living in is going to hell in a hand basket. A serious of bad days have him snap and become not only one of the most famous super villains in history but also the symbol of a rebellion.

Welcome boils and ghouls

Before comics became known for superheroes, they were horror stories

For those of you who don’t know, Creepshow was a 1982 cult classic that was a throwback to old EC horror comics like Tales from the Crypt or The Haunt of Fear. Directed by George A. Romero, written by Stephen King, special effects done by Tom Savini, and a cast including Tom Atkins, Ed Harris, Leslie Nielsen, Hal Holbrook, Adrienne Barbeau, and King himself (yes, that’s really him). Followed by a sequel in 1987 and another sequel in 2006. Unlike the first two, I have not seen Creepshow 3, but by all accounts, that’s a good thing. (NSFW)

I told you I’d go back to horror

J. Lo will just have to wait (Unmarked Spoilers)

The thing with this blog is that this isn’t my job. This is something that I do for fun. Which means I have to pay to see films out of my pocket, which means that there’s only a finite amount of movies that I can afford to see in theatres. Recently I came to a crossroads where I could only afford to see either Hustlers or The Shining (1980) back in theatres.

Shining, shimmering splendid

Well, this was a nice palate cleanser. Now I can go back to watching horror.

This movie made my opinion of The Lion King remake sink even further because I see now that film was way more a soulless cash grab than I previously thought. It was virtually a shot-for-shot remake of the original. Say what you want about this new version of Aladdin and the Will Smith genie, but at least it’s not almost the exact same thing. “Arabian Nights” has a different staging and it’s phenomenal in this version because it’s a long take that introduces all of the main characters. Aladdin (2019) also expands on the backstories and/or motivations of the characters to a far better extent than Lion King (2019).