Let's Cee a Movie

I think we’re alone now

“Hell is a teenage girl,” Anita ‘Needy’ Lesnicky (Spoilers)

My Best Friend’s Exorcism is about a best friend who undergoes an exorcism.

Sierra Six (Ryan Gosling) is a CIA assassin whose target at the movie’s start is Dining Car (Callan Mulvey). After completing his mission with help from fellow agent Dani Miranda (Ana de Armas), Six acquires a MacGuffin with things about CIA official Denny Carmichael (Regé-Jean Page) that he’s not supposed to know.

More BS

It’s Morbin’ Time (Spoilers)

Dr. Michael Morbius (Jared Leto) is a brilliant scientist with a rare blood disease. Alongside his college Martine Bancroft (Adria Arjona), Morbius is looking to find a cure for himself and his rich, surrogate brother Milo (Matt Smith). Eventually, Morbius starts experimenting with putting vampire bat DNA into a human, turning himself into a living vampire. A vampire that looks worse than the ones in Fright Night (1985), The Lost Boys, Bram Stoker’s Dracula, From Dusk Till Dawn, and John Carpenter’s Vampires, all of which were made more than a decade ago.

Reach out and touch someone

Talk about long-distance calls (Spoilers)

Finney (Mason Thames) is a young child taken by the Grabber (Ethan Hawke), a child abductor who leaves black balloons behind at the scene of his crimes. The film was based on the short story of the same name by Joe Hill. You can find it in one of the author’s anthologies—20th Century Ghosts. Later retitled The Black Phone Stories to capitalize on the movie.

Marvel’s Multiverse Madness

I missed you Raimi (Massive Spoilers)

After assisting several other heroes in other movies, Benedict Cumberbatch stars as Doctor Stephen Strange for the first time in his own film since 2016 (god, that seems like a million years ago). He is joined by a newcomer to the Marvel Cinematic Univers (MCU), Xochitl Gomez, who holds her own against all the established Marvel stars. Gomez plays America Chavez, a girl being hunted by demons for her multiverse hopping powers. Strange can think of only one person, Wanda Maximoff (Elizabeth Olsen), to help him save America.

Northman

His thoughts be bloody, or be nothing worth (Spoilers)

Amleth (Oscar Novak) is a young Viking prince who’s the son of King Aurvandill War-Raven (Ethan Hawke) and Queen Gudrún (Nicole Kidman). One day, Aurvandill and Amelth are ambushed by men working for Fjölnir (Claes Bang), Aurvandill’s brother. Amleth manages to escape, but his father is killed, and Gudrún is taken as Fjölnir’s bride. Years later, Amleth becomes Alexander Skarsgård, who sets out to avenge his father. There are no vampires (NSFW) this time around, though.

Cherry, Cherry baby

The one horror movie where you don’t want to keep it in your pants (Unmarked Spoilers)

Jody Marken (Brittany Murphy) is the daughter of local Sheriff Brent Marken (Michael Biehn) and the final girl of Cherry Falls, a slasher movie from the early 2000s. Though not by virtue of being the only virgin in the film. Most of the girls at Jody’s school seem to have never had sex, which is a massive problem when a mysterious killer targets the town’s virgins—leading the town’s teenagers to throw a massive orgy in a secret location.

The G*****n Batman

It’s “I am,” not “I’m” (Unmarked Spoilers)

After multiple delays, The Batman has finally arrived. Starting as a vehicle for Ben Affleck’s version of the character, it eventually became its own separate thing. Robert Patterson plays a Batman who’s able to delve into the character’s detective side more than previous versions. He unravels a complex, film noir mystery as he tries to catch a masked criminal named the Riddler (Paul Dano), who seeks to expose the secrets and lies of Gotham’s elite.

Dither

Where are all the superheroes? (Unmarked Spoilers)

Bill Pardy (Nathan Fillion) is the chief of police in Wheesly and has been carrying a torch for his childhood friend Starla (Elizabeth Banks) for years. Starla is a schoolteacher molding young minds like Kylie Strutemyer (Tania Saulnier). Starla’s also married to an older, wealthier, and less attractive man named Grant Grant (Michael Rooker). The lives of everyone in town are changed forever when an asteroid lands nearby.

Face to face

Another day, another chainsaw massacre. (Unmarked Spoilers)

Melody (Sarah Yarkin) is a young chef who has traveled to a small town of Harlowe along with her younger sister Lila (Elsie Fisher) and others. They’re planning on auctioning off the property of the town, but then they meet Virginia (Alice Krige), a resident still living in an orphanage with her son, Leatherface (Mark Burnham). After getting into a dispute about who owns the property, Virginia has a heart attack and later dies.