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Now They’re Here (Spoilers)

Josie (Ayo Edebiri) and PJ (Rachel Sennott) are two ugly (?) lesbian losers who are crushing on cheerleaders Isabel (Havana Rose Liu) and Brittany (Kaia Gerber). After rumors spread over them being juvenile delinquents who beat up Isabel’s d**k boyfriend Jeff (Nicholas Galitzine), Josie and PJ decide to lean into this new reputation by starting a self-defense fight club. It’s ostensibly for female empowerment, but really to get closer to Isabel and Brittany.

On The Rise

An Underrated Werewolf Movie (Spoilers)

Bad Moon is a 1996 horror film written/directed by Eric Red and based on the novel Thor by Wayne Smith. The plot concerns Uncle Ted (Michael Pare), who decided to visit with his sister Janet (Mariel Hemingway) and nephew Brett (Mason Gamble). Thor is the family dog and the only one to realize that Ted has become a dangerous werewolf. While the book follows the same plot, changes have been made. These are all the ones that stick out.

Terrible Tenure

Murder should be an automatic disqualification. (Spoilers)

Jim Bowden (Timothy McCracken) is a college professor obsessed with getting tenure. Early in the film, Dean Richard Crawley (James Shanklin), wary of tenure-induced apathy, tells Jim that he believes it to be an “antiquated concept” and that Jim should focus on doing good work. Naturally, Jim doesn’t listen because then the movie would be about five minutes long.

Drac Pack Part 2

On the ocean, no one can hear you scream (Spoilers)

Clemens (Corey Hawkins) is the most recent hire to the Demeter, a ship traveling from Romania to England. Other crew members include Captain Elliot (Liam Cunningham) and first mate Wojchek (David Dastmalchian). Eventually, Clemens discovers Anna (Aisling Franciosi) in the cargo hold, who alerts him to a more dangerous stowaway aboard the ship named Dracula (Javier Botet).

Drac Pack Part 1

**It’s Nick and Nick time in Renfield (Spoilers)**

Following the lead of Tod Browning’s Dracula, Robert Montague Renfield (Nicholas Hoult) is a solicitor who comes to the home of Count Dracula (Nicholas Cage) as part of a real estate deal, only to discover that his new client is a vampire. The film even includes footage from the 1931 movie, even though Renfield and Dracula both die at the end. Let’s ignore that and move on.

Life In Plastic

It’s Barbie’s World, They’re Just Living In It (Spoilers)

Margot Robbie is Stereotypical Barbie, or Barbie for short, whose life in Barbieland is a non-stop party until Barbie suddenly has intrusive thoughts of death, flat feet, and cellulite. After consulting Weird Barbie (Kate McKinnon), Barbie learns that she needs to go to the real world to cheer up the one playing with her so that things can return to normal. However, a stowaway on her journey is Ryan Gosling as Beach Ken, or Ken for short, who pines after her.

Guardians of the RPG

A very Marvel fantasy

Our white male lead for this diverse band of adventures is Edgin Darvis (Chris Pine), a bard who used to be a member of the Harpers, an organization of do-gooders who never ask for payment. At least until his wife Zia (Georgia Landers) is killed by his enemies, at which point Edgin forsakes the Harpers and dedicates his life to looking after his daughter Kira (Chloe Coleman) through any means necessary.

Where, oh where, has my review gone: Mad Heidi

Where, oh where, can it be?

To see my review of Mad Heidi for MovieWeb, go here.

Oogie Boogie

This one doesn’t gamble, however. (Spoilers)

The Boogeyman is a film adaptation of the short story of the same name by Stephen King, originally published in Cavalier magazine and then collected in the anthology Night Shift. It concerns the mythological creature that’s haunted children in cultures all over the world. It has many names and is commonly believed to lurk primarily under the bed or in the closet. It’s also unrelated to the 1980 horror movie of the same name, which released two sequels, or the Boogeyman trilogy.

Where, oh where, has my review gone: Perfectly Good Moment

Where, oh where, can it be?

To see my review of Perfectly Good Moment for MovieWeb, go here.